I Hate My Cheating Husband

You have betrayed a man who. We’re going to use the term ‘marriage’ here for the most part, but it. This isn't normal, I know that. I hate my stepchildren! Yes, it sounds harsh, but they make me sick to my stomach. and that friend actually suggested that they be friends and just not ever talk about their husbands. Yes my husband has changed for the worst with involvement in the. I want get even. Turning to kiss my husband Brian goodbye, I was floored by the sudden dawning that, after 28 years of electric emotional highs and soul-destroying lows. But putting it all on one person doesn't paint the entire picture. He doesn’t spend enough quality time with her. She and her husband, Bill, laughed together every day and had two kids they doted on. Plus: I refuse to kowtow to this racist, sexist, cruel old man. If you're sure he's cheating and want evidence, consider following him in a friend's car to see where he's going. I’ve been depressed most of my life. My sister's husband confessed to an online affair and apparently is going through a major midlife crisis. "After being cheated on by my husband, at first I felt embarrassed and like I just wasn't enough. I am in need of some divorce advice. i really really feel bad. "Help! I hate my husband!" Well she is doing to you what she did to Kevin when she met you. I wait for my husband to go to work so I can talk to W. I love the lord very much. I have tried really hard to forgive him. He used to hate them and the tattoos have led to many bitter arguments. When someone cheats on you, your mind and emotions scream at you to hate, punish and never forgive. If I stay I’ll perish. But our relationship fell into a day-to-day routine, taking all the excitement out of it, and the passion died. My husband tried to leave me in September 2013 as he had been out for a drink with a female colleague and apparently wanted to end it after 13 years of marriage. I got home with him – I had no home and income. Salvation and i need hlp on forgiving - My twins father is a poor example. " So You Think You Hate Your Husband? I. He is a born again but backslidden Christian. A Reader Writes… Seven years ago, when I was 8 months pregnant, I discovered my husband was cheating on me. A Letter To The One Who Cheated On Me Read this: My Boyfriend. She was telling me that they have been married for about nine years and it seemed to her that all the air was out of the marriage balloon. How Do I Shake the Anger I Feel after My Husband’s Affair? My husband was cheating on me with two women and he never stopped. You probably feel lost, confused and furious, but there are things that you can do to work on your unhealthy marriage. i had suspicions my husband may be cheating so i put a recorder hidden in his work ute which he uses and brings home every day to find out if he is; and to my surprise my gut feeling was right. and that did not stop me from cheating. I also am not judging her for cheating or abusing me anymore. I especially hate it after I have taken a bath, dried my hairI feel so good and he wants to ruin it by having sex! I just want to go to bed and sleep. What do you do when you can't rely on your spouse? I can have everything under control without having to turn to my husband for help, because he won't be there. The only time it comes up is when my mom is trying to get me to break into my dad’s phone so she can read his texts or is telling me it’s all because he “needs sex” or is crying about how deeply unhappy she is and that I need to move away from my girlfriend to be by her because she’s lonely. We met when she. You are overwhelmed with emotions that are pulling you in all directions. Dealing with a cheating spouse may be one of the hardest things you ever have to do. I can only come up with I love her but I don’t like her anymore. Spiritually, yes. This question brings people to this blog from time to time: Should I stay married for the kids? They ask it of Google or Yahoo! or Bing and arrive here. I'm glad that I came across your article. If you hate your spouse for cheating, you will benefit from seeking help from a counselor or from signing up with a creative program like the Marriage Fitness Tele-Boot Camp. I love my daughters but I also love my boyfriend too. "There's no question that men cheat more than women," says Steven Nock, PhD, a professor of sociology at the University of Virginia who has followed the marriages of over 6,000 men since. I didn’t search, I hate my husband ” I did search, ” I hate my marriage” I know that God hates divorce but I feel like I’m emotionally being attaked. My breakthrough was both accidental and gradual rather than one climactic, made-for-TV moment. i was pregnant at the time? If I found out he was cheating, he would no longer be a man. I wanted that. We both have parties at our homes, kids play together, go camping, etc. My husband has been working with a married woman in our church for more than a year now. My sister's husband confessed to an online affair and apparently is going through a major midlife crisis. How to Know If Your Partner Is Cheating—and What To Do About So You Think You Hate Your. I confronted him. It happens only sometimes, but lately it has been more and more frequent. I know it is not good. Re: I hate my Husband's Friends!!! HELP! Okay, after reading your complaint and all the replies I am wondering if any of the advice posted is posted by other married people who have themselves grown up. Lori Deschene is the founder of Tiny Buddha. What do you do when you can't rely on your spouse? I can have everything under control without having to turn to my husband for help, because he won't be there. My friend felt she and her husband were much better parents, more involved and attuned to their kids. For those of you who don’t remember, Sweaty Betty hasn’t decided if she wants to get her husband of 10 years back who cheated on her. Stop The Groping: By Anonymous to her Husband. Maybe I am just a non-discerning jerk. Rumors started that she wanted my husband. We have been married 8 years we have 1 child and another coming in a months time. I was out with my friends last Friday night and I got extremely drunk. I have been married for 4 years. My husband and I had been together for 30 years and he. Read it and act before you ignore it and weep. Last night a sister in church and I were praying for my husband that he may get to know God and accept Jesus into his life. I do regret it — because again, I never wanted to hurt anyone, and especially my husband, but I never want to hurt anyone. Though it might seem as straight-forward as "I am always mad at you because you never remember to take out the trash. When push comes to shove, a passive-aggressive person will probably return to their old, self-defeating behaviors and might not even show up for court dates regarding custody. Published: If I were Huma, with a new son, I would be very annoyed my husband had so much time on his hands, and was able to send so. "Why is my Husband So Mean to Me?" I Found How To Make My Husband Stop Being Mean. the only thing that wakes me up in this state is kind of like that Divergent girl in the SIMS she sees her reflection and says "this isn't real" and wakes up. I need advice. but in the end my husband found out. Just so happen on this day my husband came home for lunch to surprise me and caught us in a compromising position. 4 Psychological Signs You Resent Your Partner. He has cheated while I was pregnant with both my children and even left me when I was pregnant with the first one and attempted to sleep with a prostitute when I was pregnant with the second one. Mixed signals from my husband My husband left me back in January, we kept talking to each other, spending time together ( we have a 2 years old boy), on regular basis. And it was at that moment I realized how much my mom really loved me. I have done everything to arouse him. I just found out my husband is secretly taking viagra, we have a brilliant sex life but naturally my first thoughts were to be worried, concerned mostly the deception side of it, what else does he not tell me? we have a 9 year age gap so I am now thinking as a man perhaps that bothers him. I hate that this didn't tear me apart with guilt and instead I feel almost no guilt. My husband left me and my 2 children 4 wks ago and I'm just not coping! We'd been together since we were 18 and after 22 yrs I feel like I've lost everything. We’ve discussed the difference between men and women cheating. Posted May 27, 2019. Hate is a very strong word but I am going to continue with the use of it because the word describes how I felt too. Tell-Tale Signs That it's Time to Divorce typing i typed my husband hates me and is making my son hate me. My heart raced, falling in step with her words as I read the first line. he is telling me that its not that important than family to educated urself, and he is letting me. Please don't tell me how horrible or slutty I am because I know and I hate myself for it. My husband critiqued Leslie’s book and said he would not repent. I hate my husband he cheated on me and had unprotected sex with the girl. My husband and I plan to go to my 50th class reunion this year, and I understand Michael will be bringing his significant other. People come to me saying, “My husband blames me for everything,” or “My wife blames me for everything. It has been six months since leaving my husband. From day one I think we were doomed. A Special Message To My Husband On Our Anniversary I used to be a romantic. How to have sex to a real man. What If My Husband is Gay? If it turns out that a husband is, in fact, gay, the fallout can be difficult to deal with, particularly for the straight partner. It sounded incredibly lonely and painful. It’s a heartbreaking letter filled with despair, sacrifice, hope, and love; emotions that people like her understand, and those like her husband ought to know. My husband's ex wife is the most infuriating woman on this planet. my husband do have a drinking problem becaus everynight he goes out to a tavern for drunk and i dont know what els ,i gave birth recenrly to our second son and he still never change one bit not for us or neither for our children,i love my husband so much and i want a much beter life with him but it looks like without drinking he cant have a. Six months since I left him for another man. I happen to be on the opposite end here. Maybe even a bit vindictive. We argue about it all the time. You have to understand that there's a lot of changes happening to her body and I. I have been divorced for 12 years and 6 months. He has cursed my womb and says that he does not want to have any children with me. without showering first. I became just a living furniture for my husband. I want him to cry blood. he just angered me to the point of coming to Google and typing “husband is an asshole!!!” and. I only managed to tell him on Friday. I need to try and understand why my husband would cheat on me with his ex-wife of all people. How To Maintain Your Marriage When Your Husband Travels – Part 2 February 21, 2013 by Courtney 213 Comments In Part 1 – I laid out all my personal struggles with my husband traveling…the loneliness, the hardships of having to manage the children and emergencies alone, the fears and exhaustion and even the underlying bitterness from seeing. One day I ran away with another man. To find out if your husband is cheating, keep an eye on his phone in case he gets a suspicious message from someone you've never heard of. I wanted to not care like he didn't care for me so I started talking to this guy online. I am frequently criticized for fingering the husband more often than the wife, but have no problem standing my ground from scripture. the last time I met with him I had a horrible fight with my husband and I went to meet with my friend and I couldn't stop. After an affair is revealed is the worst time to make life-changing decisions. My mother had a. *About 2 months ago after holding in my wondering & fears that are now rampant, I sat him down, gently, caring & calmly told him how I felt, was there anything he wasn't telling me, that I hate feeling worried that he's hiding something. He's told me that my legs and my belly and my big butt just mortify him. I have been divorced for 12 years and 6 months. I don't know what to do. So, while there's hate (or you believe there is), there's still a chance for love to be reborn. like all marriages our marriage was up and down but everything was always workable and we always somehow managed to sort things out calmly. Why should I lose my world over pride or another woman?. In retrospect, do you regret cheating on your husband? Yes, and no. But my friends and family won’t forgive him as easily and they will see him in a new light. (2Tim 2:25-26) Lord give him a new spirit, take away the stony heart out of him that he may hear and follow you. A letter to … my cheating, lying husband I have lost my husband and my best friend and I am not sure I will ever fully recover from the heartache you have caused me. Quickly making big decisions. I'm at my wits end & can't face spending my life like this. I believe God is. Read Will God Bring Vengeance on My Cheating Husband? from Dr. He has cheated while I was pregnant with both my children and even left me when I was pregnant with the first one and attempted to sleep with a prostitute when I was pregnant with the second one. Re: I hate my Husband's Friends!!! HELP! Okay, after reading your complaint and all the replies I am wondering if any of the advice posted is posted by other married people who have themselves grown up. After an affair is revealed is the worst time to make life-changing decisions. It happened once and was a culmination of several factors (finding my worth. We love God and we seek Him in all we do. My wife is cheating on me with a vibrator! On June 21, 2014 1:32 am In News by akintayo eribake. And, she couldn't understand why, after months of apologies, groveling, and efforts to please him, her husband still hadn't truly forgiven her. Look, my husband lies about everything including his own nationality. Out of those 9 years he has cheated on me during 8 of them. When I was married my husband never showed me any type of interest in me, he was too busy with his work, his job, his career. (and I hate tomatoes) then I probably won’t enjoy the meal. since people who caught their partners cheating write in seeking advice while. He turns off is phone so that I can't contact him while he's away for 2 to 3 days at a time. My mother dying when I was in my 20's was traumatic. The thing that bothers me the most is how unaffectionate he has become. Ask Carolyn Hax: I hate this cheating jerk, and he’s married to my sister My sister’s husband confessed to an online affair and apparently is going through a major midlife crisis. A wife wrote this letter to her husband to let him know how she felt over the years of infidelity and the emotional neglect she tolerated when they were together. I cheated on my husband and now need help! was created by leanne402 He is the most loving and caring person I have ever met and is the first person to love me unconditionally. In other words, seen through a prism of 100% about them , in that moment. When I get angry, I am unable to control my anger, I talk. Maybe I am just a non-discerning jerk. Signs Your Husband Doesn’t Care About You Or Your Marriage Anymore By: Leslie Cane: I often hear from wives who tell me that they don’t think that their husband cares about them anymore. 17 Horrifying Cheating Stories That Will Make You Want To Stay Single Forever. After an affair is revealed is the worst time to make life-changing decisions. ” When I greeted my husband at the door in it, he went ashen. That’s free will. My husband and I were laying on the couch 7 months after we were married, right before he was deployed. 9999999% of those times when I HATE him I have cramps and he DOESN’T, so there’s that! Love this blog!. to hold on to anger. If I see him driving around town and he waves at me, I will wave back. Recently a woman named Sharon told me that she had no hope of having a happy marriage because her husband hated her. Out of those 9 years he has cheated on me during 8 of them. I adore my husband. We have been married for. Not to mention that our sex life is non-existent. And they should. i really really feel bad. I happen to be on the opposite end here. I feel my husband and his 14-y-o niece are lovers You may also hate the girl for life for. If anything, I expect her to hate my guts and damn me for what I have done. I was out of. He thought he needed to get a divorce because he disliked his wife so much. I cheated on my husband -- how do I heal my relationship? —Done Cheating. Why should I lose my world over pride or another woman?. ” My husband never went back to the group, and he is now my ex. Cheated on my boyfriend, now he hates me? I've been with my boyfriend for a year and I've been cheating on him for 6 months with my ex. I'd tell myself my husband, Paul, was normal, that every man was into pornography. Most of my friends tell me to leave her, and my family tells me to stick it out. When someone cheats on you, your mind and emotions scream at you to hate, punish and never forgive. I will forever in my life remain grateful to this great man for bringing my lover back to me after 9 weeks of emotional tears and pains during the period i lost my lover to another guy, but this great man brought my man back to me just within 3days. I made sure (you don't want to know how) he stayed over far longer than he intended to and had to rush home at 3:30 a. He explained that he was seriously struggling in his marriage. My husband was unfaithful and lied about it for years Now that I've discovered his deception, it makes me doubt the whole basis of our relationship. I fucking hate cancer. I hate my husband, I hate my life, I even struggle with my faith lately and my faith in God has been my anchor my whole life. There's no right answer when it comes to deciding whether or not you want to make things work. Not to mention that our sex life is non-existent. I hate my husband he cheated on me and had unprotected sex with the girl. The person she is cheating with is also a "friend" of our son. My Daughter and her Husband Hate my Husband. Watch Queue Queue. One day I ran away with another man. I am frequently criticized for fingering the husband more often than the wife, but have no problem standing my ground from scripture. This isn't normal, I know that. The professional basketball player was recently caught with a girl who was not his wife during what was called a double. My mother had a. One of the reasons I fell in love with my present husband was that he stayed in a bad marriage for his childrenwithout cheating. I was sorry—truly sorry. ” An hour earlier, I’d grabbed his phone, curious as to whom. My wife is 19 weeks pregnant and she is always mad at me and always tells me that she hates me. That’s why I wrote, What to Do Immediately When Your Husband Leaves You and then followed that up with this article. A cheating husband may not understand the full extent of how his infidelity has traumatized his betrayed wife. without showering first. By YETUNDE AREBI. Please don't tell me how horrible or slutty I am because I know and I hate myself for it. We had a son who is 5 years old now. to get back together with my husband because for goodness sake i am. A Letter To The One Who Cheated On Me Read this: My Boyfriend. My husband tried to leave me in September 2013 as he had been out for a drink with a female colleague and apparently wanted to end it after 13 years of marriage. It has been six months since leaving my husband. My husband has been working with a married woman in our church for more than a year now. He loves both of us and wants to stay with us. I try and think back to what I may have done to him to make him like this and I just can't think of anything. I Hate My Husband's Ex-wife. My husband got another woman pregnant and the child is now a year old. So on those days (and nights!) when you might not feel warm and fuzzy toward your husband, try to find at least a few reasons to be appreciative of him. Was there anything I could've done differently? Was there something I missed about my husband's behavior? Why does my husband hate me? What's important to know is that you're not alone. Thank you for that article my bf was cheating for 3 months my gut was shouting at me I even tasked him about it and quess what turns out he was cheating with the same girl I suspected lied to my face and used me best part was not able to break it off so waited for me to break it and blamed me for everything men are pigs cheating should be a crime. Then you can focus on figuring out why your husband is cheating and if he is willing to stop so that you can work on repairing your relationship. 12 Women Share The Moment They Knew They Were Caught Cheating my husband begged for a reconciliation while he was in rehab, but I told him that had already moved on. Three months ago, I discovered that he had been cheating on me with one of his exes. He doesn’t spend enough quality time with her. We have been married for 10 years. " I had sex in the house while my husband was in bed. My mother had a. Last night a sister in church and I were praying for my husband that he may get to know God and accept Jesus into his life. For the first few weeks everything was going great, then, about three weeks after we'd moved in together, my husband got drunk and gave me his phone to make a call, and it was open on an email. This morning, I sat down to the family computer, and I was greeted by the hardcore porn site my husband accidentally left on screen. I cheated my husband. 4 days was our 6 year anniversary so i dropped our daughter off at her grandparents after work so i could get ready to go out to dinner with my husband. How to Pull Off the Greatest Revenge on the Person That Did You Wrong Speaking of cheating which my filthy whore Ex wife of mine after being married for 15 years. ? We were already in a troubled marriage for last 10 years. I tried to be the better man and marry her when she was pregnant. But I eventually realized that there was more at stake than my own pride and my own wishes. I'm now divorced with a 5 year old girl, he cheated on me. You can win your husband back from the other woman if you have the right focus. I was once one of those kids for whom a couple stayed married, so I can tell you there are some real plusses. And I hate to say it, madam, but. He explained that he was seriously struggling in his marriage. To make this short and simple I contacted the woman he was connecting with and she explained to me that he was divorced (not true). I'm also feeling betrayed, inadequate, and sad. 5 year old and a 15 month old. The thing that bothers me the most is how unaffectionate he has become. I met my husband in 2007 in basic trng and later reconnected in 2010. I just found out my husband is secretly taking viagra, we have a brilliant sex life but naturally my first thoughts were to be worried, concerned mostly the deception side of it, what else does he not tell me? we have a 9 year age gap so I am now thinking as a man perhaps that bothers him. I don’t know what to do. last week my husband has presented me with divorce papers, It was the greatest shock of my life. I became just a living furniture for my husband. If he refuses, go by yourself. I was doing my best. Some of us admit it while others go on their merry way, burying their head in the sand. My Husband Had An Affair: “After finding his love letter to another woman, I made him leave” Sandra Barrett* had what she considered to be not just a good marriage but a great one. every year in the 'anniversary month' of. You can view it right away or wait until you have more time-the link doesn't expire. I was pampered and brought up in my teens, but fell in love, and married in my 18th yr. I didn't search, I hate my husband " I did search, " I hate my marriage" I know that God hates divorce but I feel like I'm emotionally being attaked. Partnership & Pay for a share. I Prayerfully Yours, Me - Last night I talked to my daughter Last night I talked to my daughter about 2 really big topics. I used to be like you hugging my husband, him buying me flowers when I knew I was being deceitful. A Letter To The One Who Cheated On Me Read this: My Boyfriend. To a cheating husband, I'm not blind to the fact that a partner cheating is something that can happen to anyone. HELLO to my friends out there i am testifying about the good work of a man who help me it has been hell from the day my husband left me i am a woman with two kids my problem stated when the father of my kids travel i never help he was living but as at two weeks i did not set my eye on my husband i try calling but he was not taken my call some. You can also check his Facebook if he leaves it logged in on a computer. How To Fall Out Of Love With Your Ex… If Possible I had suspicions that he was cheating on me. He doesn't financially contribute. Obviously, my husband cheated on me. I wanted my ex husband to long for me, want me and care enough about me to woo me. i really really feel bad. Information and support for people who are dealing with cheating and narcissism in their relationship. I hate my husband, I hate my life, I even struggle with my faith lately and my faith in God has been my anchor my whole life. "You've Got Hate Mail," the wife of a cheater. Let's start out with a few things you SHOULD NOT do. When push comes to shove, a passive-aggressive person will probably return to their old, self-defeating behaviors and might not even show up for court dates regarding custody. How to get my husband to talk to me after I cheated on him? My husband Jamie and I have been together for eight years, married for four. It means that even though you may be surprised or you may want to work on your relationship, they’ve reach a point where that is no longer possible. 17 Horrifying Cheating Stories That Will Make You Want To Stay Single Forever. My friend Jane's new boyfriend, Peter, is a tool. He’s says he is willing to stay in the marriage for the children and cares about me. I also feel like my sexual frustrations have been pushed to the side for now. You will need to get your husband’s attention, help him to enjoy you again, and not let him have his cake and eat it, too. As the night went on, I noticed a few times that my friend kept bringing up conversation about her ‘friend’ at work and how she done this and done that. Don't waste time trying to get even. I'm very spiritual, and I do understand and believe that having an adulterous affair is a sin. It affected him very much because he didn't really know much about it. You can also check his Facebook if he leaves it logged in on a computer. He thought he needed to get a divorce because he disliked his wife so much. My husband attended a Strength in Numbers group three times. Are you a victim of infidelity? Have you been unfaithful? Do you know someone who is? The cheaterland infidelity discussion forums provide a place where you can discuss your experience, find support, interact with others who have been in similar circumstances or are interested in the topic. I don’t know if I can live this way. “It might sound ordinary for a woman to find out her husband’s cheating on her, but not if you’re the woman and it’s your husband. Maybe even a bit vindictive. Find out 11 signs that your husband or boyfriend might be having an affair at WomansDay. I am a stay at home mum and I feel helpless…so please advise me. It's amazing to think about all that transpired since our first. I almost lost my life to alcohol… I lost my job, I got sick and was admitted into the hospital emergency ward, Two days later when I opened my eyes I saw my mom and my husband beside me holding my hands. I just know I don’t want to exist anymore. A wife wrote this letter to her husband to let him know how she felt over the years of infidelity and the emotional neglect she tolerated when they were together. Some days, I had the energy to really dig in and be a fantastic mother, but it was just a distraction. When I asked how she knew that, she said that he was always scowling at her and that he took every opportunity to say mean things. My husband and I have. Jealousy is relating to insecurity and fear, it is also about control. He loves both of us and wants to stay with us. To my sweet, gentle husband: I know that I don’t always show it and I definitely don’t vocalize this enough, but I am so grateful to have you in my life. I Prayerfully Yours, Me - Last night I talked to my daughter Last night I talked to my daughter about 2 really big topics. I divorced my husband in January of 2004. This video is unavailable. The reason you hate this person is that you did not know who and what you were getting involved with when you got married. I was a shitty husband because I didn't respect my wife's thoughts and feelings about things I mistakenly believed didn't matter. My Husband’s Cheating on Me—With His Cell Phone. Information and support for people who are dealing with cheating and narcissism in their relationship. MARRIAGE Respect Your Husband (Even if You Don’t Think He “Deserves” It) By Nancy C. Plus there is the other side of the whole my husband is an asshole thing and it’s my wife is a bitch. He just made up some lame excuse that he had to stop by Terry’s house to get a part for his truck. He has tried and been willing to try toys, oral, manual, etc, but it's not the same for me, those things we've done before the ED problem all were a form of foreplay and that how they continue to live in my mind, so to me they should all lead to intercourse and again, I am left unfulfilled. a girlfriend of mine and i were discussing this topic the other day. May 24, 2016. What do I do?. He loves both of us and wants to stay with us. Then you can focus on figuring out why your husband is cheating and if he is willing to stop so that you can work on repairing your relationship. A Reader Writes… Seven years ago, when I was 8 months pregnant, I discovered my husband was cheating on me. one boob, then the other, then we're off. my husband so much but he was cheating on me with another woman and this makes him break up with me so that he can be. My wife doesn't ask my opinion before planning things with her mother or brother's family even if it overrides plans we've already made. I just know I don’t want to exist anymore. My ex came by my job while i was on lunch saying he wants me. He asked me if I needed a milkshake in a text while at the hospital. I'm trying to gain his trust back and make him think the other man is completely outta the picture. The fact-checkers, whose work is more and more important for those who prefer facts over lies, police the line between fact and falsehood on a day-to-day basis, and do a great job. Today, my small contribution is to pass along a very good overview that reflects on one of Trump’s favorite overarching falsehoods. Namely: Trump describes an America in which everything was going down the tubes under  Obama, which is why we needed Trump to make America great again. And he claims that this project has come to fruition, with America setting records for prosperity under his leadership and guidance. “Obama bad; Trump good” is pretty much his analysis in all areas and measurement of U.S. activity, especially economically. Even if this were true, it would reflect poorly on Trump’s character, but it has the added problem of being false, a big lie made up of many small ones. Personally, I don’t assume that all economic measurements directly reflect the leadership of whoever occupies the Oval Office, nor am I smart enough to figure out what causes what in the economy. But the idea that presidents get the credit or the blame for the economy during their tenure is a political fact of life. Trump, in his adorable, immodest mendacity, not only claims credit for everything good that happens in the economy, but tells people, literally and specifically, that they have to vote for him even if they hate him, because without his guidance, their 401(k) accounts “will go down the tubes.” That would be offensive even if it were true, but it is utterly false. The stock market has been on a 10-year run of steady gains that began in 2009, the year Barack Obama was inaugurated. But why would anyone care about that? It’s only an unarguable, stubborn fact. Still, speaking of facts, there are so many measurements and indicators of how the economy is doing, that those not committed to an honest investigation can find evidence for whatever they want to believe. Trump and his most committed followers want to believe that everything was terrible under Barack Obama and great under Trump. That’s baloney. Anyone who believes that believes something false. And a series of charts and graphs published Monday in the Washington Post and explained by Economics Correspondent Heather Long provides the data that tells the tale. The details are complicated. Click through to the link above and you’ll learn much. But the overview is pretty simply this: The U.S. economy had a major meltdown in the last year of the George W. Bush presidency. Again, I’m not smart enough to know how much of this was Bush’s “fault.” But he had been in office for six years when the trouble started. So, if it’s ever reasonable to hold a president accountable for the performance of the economy, the timeline is bad for Bush. GDP growth went negative. Job growth fell sharply and then went negative. Median household income shrank. The Dow Jones Industrial Average dropped by more than 5,000 points! U.S. manufacturing output plunged, as did average home values, as did average hourly wages, as did measures of consumer confidence and most other indicators of economic health. (Backup for that is contained in the Post piece I linked to above.) Barack Obama inherited that mess of falling numbers, which continued during his first year in office, 2009, as he put in place policies designed to turn it around. By 2010, Obama’s second year, pretty much all of the negative numbers had turned positive. By the time Obama was up for reelection in 2012, all of them were headed in the right direction, which is certainly among the reasons voters gave him a second term by a solid (not landslide) margin. Basically, all of those good numbers continued throughout the second Obama term. The U.S. GDP, probably the single best measure of how the economy is doing, grew by 2.9 percent in 2015, which was Obama’s seventh year in office and was the best GDP growth number since before the crash of the late Bush years. GDP growth slowed to 1.6 percent in 2016, which may have been among the indicators that supported Trump’s campaign-year argument that everything was going to hell and only he could fix it. During the first year of Trump, GDP growth grew to 2.4 percent, which is decent but not great and anyway, a reasonable person would acknowledge that — to the degree that economic performance is to the credit or blame of the president — the performance in the first year of a new president is a mixture of the old and new policies. In Trump’s second year, 2018, the GDP grew 2.9 percent, equaling Obama’s best year, and so far in 2019, the growth rate has fallen to 2.1 percent, a mediocre number and a decline for which Trump presumably accepts no responsibility and blames either Nancy Pelosi, Ilhan Omar or, if he can swing it, Barack Obama. I suppose it’s natural for a president to want to take credit for everything good that happens on his (or someday her) watch, but not the blame for anything bad. Trump is more blatant about this than most. If we judge by his bad but remarkably steady approval ratings (today, according to the average maintained by 538.com, it’s 41.9 approval/ 53.7 disapproval) the pretty-good economy is not winning him new supporters, nor is his constant exaggeration of his accomplishments costing him many old ones). I already offered it above, but the full Washington Post workup of these numbers, and commentary/explanation by economics correspondent Heather Long, are here. On a related matter, if you care about what used to be called fiscal conservatism, which is the belief that federal debt and deficit matter, here’s a New York Times analysis, based on Congressional Budget Office data, suggesting that the annual budget deficit (that’s the amount the government borrows every year reflecting that amount by which federal spending exceeds revenues) which fell steadily during the Obama years, from a peak of $1.4 trillion at the beginning of the Obama administration, to $585 billion in 2016 (Obama’s last year in office), will be back up to $960 billion this fiscal year, and back over $1 trillion in 2020. (Here’s the New York Times piece detailing those numbers.) Trump is currently floating various tax cuts for the rich and the poor that will presumably worsen those projections, if passed. As the Times piece reported: